SEXIST, DAMN WOMEN DRIVERS

Distracted Driving Incident



This morning on the Interstate,
I looked over to my left and there was a

Woman

In a brand new
Cadillac

Doing 65 mph

With her
Face up next to her

Rear view mirror

Putting on her eyeliner.

I looked away

For a couple seconds...

to continue shaving

And when I looked back she was

Halfway over in my lane,

Still working on that makeup.

As a man,

I don't scare easily.

But she scared me so much;
I had to put on my seat belt
and
I dropped

My electric shaver

Which knocked

The donut
Out of my other hand.

In all The confusion of trying
To straighten out the car

Using my knees against
The steering wheel,

It knocked

My Cell Phone

Away from my ear

Which fell

Into the coffee

Between my legs!

Splashed,

And burned

Big Jim and the Twins,

Ruined the damn phone,

Soaked my trousers,

And disconnected an
Important call.

Damn women drivers!